Facial Expressions That Get More Matches: The Psychology of Smiles and More

The Science of Facial Expression and Attraction

Neuropsychologist Paul Ekman's groundbreaking research identified six universal facial expressions recognized across all cultures: happiness, sadness, anger, fear, surprise, and disgust. For dating photos, understanding which expressions trigger attraction-and which repel-is critical.

Facial expression is one of the strongest signals in a first impression, and unlike your bone structure it is fully under your control. The expression you choose can noticeably change how warm, trustworthy and approachable you come across.

The Duchenne Smile: The Gold Standard

Not all smiles are created equal. The Duchenne smile-named after French neurologist Guillaume Duchenne-is the only smile that engages both mouth and eye muscles, creating the authentic expression our brains evolved to recognize.

Duchenne vs Non-Duchenne (Social) Smiles:

• Duchenne Smile: Activates zygomatic major (mouth) and orbicularis oculi (eyes), creates crow's feet
• Social Smile: Only zygomatic major (mouth), eyes remain emotionally neutral

Research Evidence:

• Smiles that reach the eyes are generally judged as more genuine than mouth-only smiles
• Genuine smiles tend to be rated as more trustworthy than polite social smiles
• Warm, engaged faces tend to hold a viewer's attention
• A genuine smile gives people an easier reason to start a conversation

The Duchenne smile works because it's impossible to fake-it requires genuine positive emotion. Our brains detect authenticity unconsciously, creating trust and attraction.

The Serious/Smolder Look: Context Matters

The intense, serious expression (sometimes called "smolder") shows surprising gender and context differences.

For Men:

• Serious expression in first photo: usually less approachable than a smile for a broad audience
• However: some viewers, especially on casual-leaning apps, respond well to a confident, intense look
• Perceived as more masculine and confident but less approachable
• Works better in evening/night photos and urban settings

For Women:

• A serious main photo tends to come across as less approachable
• Smile consistently outperformed across all contexts
• Exception: Fashion/artistic profiles where serious look aligned with aesthetic

Strategic Use:

Include one serious-expression photo (not as main), especially for men. This provides variety and demonstrates different facets of personality. But lead with smile for maximum broad appeal.

The Laugh: Authentic Joy

Photos capturing genuine laughter show strong positive effects-when done right.

Research Findings:

• Authentic laughter photos strongly signal that you are fun to be with
• They tend to suggest a good sense of humor
• Generated more conversation-starting messages
• However: Must appear natural, not forced or over-the-top

How to Capture:

• Laugh at genuine joke during photoshoot
• Avoid staged "fake laugh"-viewers detect inauthenticity
• Mid-laugh often more flattering than full open-mouth laugh
• Ensure photo captures joy in eyes, not just mouth

Best Use: Second or third photo to demonstrate personality depth. Can appear too casual for main photo.

The Subtle Smile (Mona Lisa Effect)

The slight, mysterious smile shows interesting psychological effects.

Characteristics:

• Closed mouth or very slight teeth showing
• Slight upturn at corners of mouth
• Engaged eyes (critical-otherwise appears aloof)
• Creates air of mystery and intrigue

What tends to happen:

• Can suit profiles that want a calm, understated feel
• Often fits relationship-focused platforms
• Can make a profile more memorable when the eyes stay warm
• Generated longer initial messages (viewers curious to know more)

Caution: Can appear unfriendly if eyes aren't engaged. Ensure warmth comes through.

The Neutral Expression: When It Works

Neutral facial expressions (no smile, relaxed face) are generally not recommended for dating photos, with specific exceptions.

When Neutral Works:

• Artistic/fashion-forward profiles (aesthetic alignment)
• Second or third photos providing variety
• Activity shots where focus is on the activity
• High-fashion photography where serious look is stylistic choice

When Neutral Fails:

• Main profile photo (usually underperforms a warm smile)
• Relationship-focused platforms (appears distant)
• Without strong eye contact (appears uninterested)

The Surprise Expression: Use Sparingly

Surprise (raised eyebrows, wide eyes, open mouth) is one of Ekman's universal expressions but rarely effective in dating photos.

Research Shows:

• Often perceived as staged and unnatural, which hurts authenticity
• Can appear startled or unflattering
• Exception: Candid action shots where surprise is genuine reaction

Recommendation: Avoid unless truly candid moment.

Expressions to Absolutely Avoid

1. Anger/Frustration

• Obvious but worth stating: never use angry or frustrated expression
• Even a mild frown tends to put people off
• Viewed as red flag for temperament

2. Sadness/Melancholy

• Downturned mouth, lowered eyes
• Triggers negative emotional contagion in viewers
• Usually makes a profile feel less inviting
• Perceived as depressed or low-energy

3. Contempt (Unilateral Lip Curl)

• Slight sneer on one side of mouth
• Unconsciously signals superiority or disdain
• Extremely off-putting to most viewers
• Often appears unintentionally-review photos carefully

4. Dead Eyes (Mouth Smiling, Eyes Not)

• Social smile without eye engagement
• Triggers uncanny valley response
• Appears fake and untrustworthy
• Common in forced selfies-ensure genuine emotion

Gender Differences in Expression Preferences

Research reveals different optimal expressions by gender.

Women's Profiles:

• Most effective: Duchenne smile with direct eye contact
• Second best: Genuine laugh
• Third: Subtle smile with warmth
• Avoid: Serious/intense looks (unless very specific aesthetic)

Men's Profiles:

• Most effective: Duchenne smile with confidence
• Second best: Slight smile with strong eye contact
• Third: One serious/confident photo for variety
• Avoid: Over-the-top expressions, appearing try-hard

Matching Expression to Dating Goals

Your expression should align with what you're seeking.

For Serious Relationships:

• Warm, genuine Duchenne smiles
• Approachable, friendly expressions
• Variety showing emotional range
• Emphasis on authenticity over intensity

For Casual Dating:

• Confident, slightly intense expressions acceptable
• Fun, playful expressions
• Smile still recommended but can include more variety
• Slight mystery can work (don't overdo)

Creating Genuine Expressions

The key to effective facial expressions is authenticity-our brains detect fake smiles instantly.

Techniques for Genuine Smiles:

1. Think genuine happy thoughts: Recall funny memory or happy moment
2. Engage in real conversation: Have photographer tell jokes or discuss topics you love
3. Use genuine triggers: Listen to comedy, interact with pets, whatever makes you authentically smile
4. Avoid "say cheese": Creates forced social smile, not Duchenne
5. Relax first: Tension prevents genuine expression-take time to relax before shooting

The Power of Micro-Expressions

Ekman's research on micro-expressions (fleeting expressions lasting 1/25th second) reveals that subtle expressions convey powerful information.

For Dating Photos:

• Slight eyebrow raise: Signals interest and openness
• Nose wrinkle during smile: Enhances perception of genuine joy
• Slight head tilt: Increases approachability
• Lip corners naturally upturned: Signals positive disposition

These micro-elements combine to create overall impression-why some photos just "feel right."

Expression Variety Across Photo Set

Strategic expression variety creates well-rounded impression.

Recommended Distribution (6-photo profile):

1. Photo 1: Duchenne smile, direct eye contact (establishes warmth and trust)
2. Photo 2: Slight smile or confident expression (shows depth)
3. Photo 3: Genuine laugh or joy (demonstrates fun personality)
4. Photo 4: Natural expression during activity (authentic moment)
5. Photo 5: Warm smile in different context (consistency check)
6. Photo 6: Variety expression based on personality

Testing and Optimization

A/B test expressions to determine what works best for you.

Testing Method:

• Create identical profiles with different main photo expressions
• Track match quantity and quality
• Measure message response rates
• Note which expression generates better conversation quality

Individual faces show variations-your optimal expression may differ from average.

Conclusion: Express Yourself Strategically

Facial expression is the most controllable variable in dating photos-and one of the most impactful. The Duchenne smile remains the gold standard across contexts, but strategic variety that authentically represents your personality creates the most successful profiles.

Your expression communicates before words are read. Make it say what you want it to say.